執着

為什麼沒有早一步相遇？也沒有晚一步？

執着有时候是很累的。。

明明知道不应该；明明知道不可能。。

为什么，还是会執着？

或许，執着只是因为放不下；不是爱。。

爱情，终究是经营不来；也免强不来的。。

我们只能放任它人，也放任自己。。让一切顺其自然。。

或许，有一天。。我们会发现其实我们并没有自己想像的深情。。

等到那一天，卸下心中的執着。。我们或许会更懂得珍惜当下的美好。。

好想来点微薰。。

微薰了，或许就不会那么執着了。。

Updates..of life and friendship

All in a sudden,i thought of writing an updates about recent life here..maybe just because that facebook has become a too public place and i do not like to talk too openly there..

So since that my blog here has been isolated for such a long period of time,guess there will be very few people to stop by..

anyhow,its just a personal free space for me to write out any of my plain thoughts..iamhappytowritewhatiwanttowritehere,ok?

Well,just finish watching a movie -"The Women", acted by Megan Ryan..its a 2008 movie. The strong bond of friendship fond by the women in the movie makes me think about my friends around me. I hope I do have these kind of strong friendship with my bffs until the day we all grow olds.Maybe at the time of the day, we shall do botox together, discuss about our husband and kids if we are all married or maybe just tea together while recalling to our good old times again and again.Ohhhhh,how sweet it gonna be! i wish it will all come true..

p/s: u know i just love u,my bffs!

i just do my first laser treatment weeks ago, finger cross that i will have baby smooth skin very soon and no more pimples,pls! ; )

the time bomb! USE THE RIGHT WORDS!!

i'm back in action!

been alone to do works and get to observe all walks of life..

This opens me to see the society ills of polarising evidence.. eg: you-are-amazing-but-the-truth-is-you're-crap!! (inner thoughts)

take your mask down,bitch! you are not treating people sincerely, so you do not deserve to be treated sincerely as well! FAIR and SQUARE !! same goes to the business today, especially service industry..

As a marketing students, i always know that social interacting skill is important to build up a wide network. However, the key of SUCCESS is ONLY to service people SINCERELY from your heart!

and as apply to friendship,i'd always treasure all my friends around me.. when i say FRIENDS, i DO REALLY MEAN IT!! but somehow, i'd always missed the moments where we used to talk closely, intimately, OPENLY TO ANYTHING,EVERYTHING!! okay, i may sound childish or boring or whatever, those are the moments where TRUE FRIENDSHIP are formed!

i'd always feel more comfortable when i am alone lately or only with close friends! this is because that i feel awkward when surrounded with clown or insincere fake people!

evidence to this are two evidence tht i would like to share:

evidence 1: beautician A

"i feel sad for ur skin condition..", "r u okay? is it because tht u feel stress lately?are u into a relationship?and blah blah blah"- she is ultimately sincere or even tht she doesn't mean it from her bottom of heart, at least she did not make me feel bad abt myself..but one thing i would like to point out is tht DO NOT EVER ASK ANYTHING ABT UR CUSTOMER"S PRIVACY! i dun feel tht there's a need for me to tell u abt my privacy tht is cross beyond my line, so DON"T ASK! perhaps, she acts over caring..

evidence 2: beautician B

"aiyoyo! ur skin condition is terrible like hell!i feel headache looking at ur pimples! this is what happen when you seldom come for facial! " - okay! i admit tht i do not hav good skin!i do hav pimples since long ago but it never cure from roots!i come for facial is because i need you to clear it away for me, not for u to criticize till make me feel that you are not professional, u do not respect ur customer, you are a paliah beautician and etc..

The above evidence does not mean tht i cannot take negative feedback or criticism! but it's about the way tht how they talk abt it!

GOOD CRITICISM BUILDS PEOPLE UP; BAD CRITICISM TEARS THEM DOWN!!

no one likes to hear tht they are not awesome, including myself! BUT if you use the right words, i will thank u for telling me the truth and helping me to improve..

So, PLEASE MIND YOUR WORDS! USE THE RIGHT WORDS, IDIOTS!!

okay, i shall call this entry a time bomb! lol ;p till then, wait for the next bomb ba =)

the decision

Well, finally i had made up my mind..i decided to stay...
I know that it is an opportunity of once-in-a-life-time and almost all the people around me encouraged me to go...
After all, i just do not have enough confidence to prepare myself to undergo the loneliness in the cold there...
*p/s : hopefully i won't regret in the future

Anyhow, i had enrolled a japanese language course at UTAR and hopefully i can make full use of it to benefit my future undergoings. Or perhaps, i can probably go to Japan for half year for an intensive course? Who's know?!

Of all the lovely friends i had here, i just wanted to say thank you all so much for all the cheers and laughter that we shared...

I love all my BFF! -xoxo-

Goodbye?

i know it's been long time that i never update my blog...been busy in love,i admit~
and now,all in a sudden..i fall into a situation that i might face long distance separation in a near future...
i'm so reluctant to leave but yet i realised that i have to focus on a big picture instead of a small puzzle...
and now, i am emo-ing alone in Wendy's Jaya One listening to James Blunt's song - Goodbye my lover...
and it inspires me to write this blog......

Did i disappoint you or let you down?

Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?

'Cause I saw the end before we begun,

Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.

So I took what's mine by eternal right.

Took your soul out into the night.

It may be over but it won't stop there,

I am here for you if you'd only care.

You touched my heart you touched my soul.

You changed my life and all my goals.

And love is blind and that i Knew when,

My heart was blinded by you.

I've kissed your lips and held your head.

Shared your dreams and shared your bed.

I know you welll, I know your smell.

I've been addicted to you.

Goodbye my lover,

Goodbye my friend.

You have been the one.

You have been the one for me.

Goodbye my lover,

Goodbye my friend,

you have been the one.

you have been the one for me.

I'm a dreamer but when I wake,

You can't break my spirit

It's in your dreams you take.

And as you move on, remember me,

remember us and all we used to be

I've seen you cry,I've seen you smile.

I've watched you sleeping for a while.

I'd be the father of your child.

I'd spend a lifetime with you.

I know your fears and you know mine.

We've had our doubts but now we're fine,

And I love you,I swear that's true.

I cannot live without you.

Goodbye my lover,

Goodbye mye friend.

You have been the one.

You have been the one for me.

Goodbye my lover,

Goodbye my friend.

You have been the one.

You have been the one for me.

And i still hold your hand in mine.

In mine when i'm asleep.

And i will bear my soul in time,

When I'm kneeling at your feet.

Goodbye my lover.

Goodbye my friend.

You have been the one.

You have been the one for me.

Goodbye my lover.

Goodbye my friend.

You have been the one.

You have been the one for me.

I'm so hollow, baby..I'm so hollow.

I'm so,I'm so, I'm so hollow...

no matter what, pls do remember that i love you,b~

the emo queen's crap

I wonder...what spell i am under...
I'm in a state of depression...i think...
Eyes are red,tears are shed..
Felt so hopeless that i can't fix anything...
I don't know what else that i can do to make things get better...
I don't know...
I don't know if i can still believe and keep my faith on my journey...
i don't know...
Happiness...Laughter...smiley...it's all seems far far away..that i can't reach...
Family..friendship..love.... it seems that i cannot afford to gain anything of it...
i hate myself...
[tonight i wanna cry]

well,i know i'm crapping...do ignore my crap...

i'm just another emo out here...

牙关

那年少轻狂的岁月，我没有忘记它是有多么的美丽。。

那喧闹的笑声很真实的一直在回响。。。

一起翻越城墙的梦，依然会是我们共同持有的梦想吗？

成长真的是过滤梦想的旅程吗？可我最不想过滤掉的是和你一起的旅程。。。

如果因为爱而让我迷失了自己；失去了情谊。。。

那我希望因为情而让我们可以一起继续这旅程。。。

收集了许多许多我们灿烂的笑脸，把回忆图一块一块的拼着。。也希望可以一直拼着。。

听说死神也怕咬紧牙关。。。

你怕不怕？我不怕。。

因为你给的勇气战胜了我内心的恐惧。。

五月天的牙关让我继续。。。

死神也怕咬紧牙关的故事：

http://blog.sina.com.cn/s/blog_4a9edaf4010008vn.html

moving on with the days

Exam is approaching,yet there're tonnes of workloads awaiting me to complete...
i got no time to shed a tear right this moment anymore...
i have to move on!

Had a discussion with a group member at The Border's Starbucks at The Garden justnow...It takes time to modify others works so,we decide to re-do everything...It will be much easier for us...This might be kind of bit autocratic and sound irrespect to others but we are lack o f time to ask them to re-do and guide them how to do...it's so much tiring...


Since, we are at Starbucks,i get myself a new drink intro for X'mas season...

Instead of my all-time-fav-Java Chips, i get myself Toffee Nut Frapuccino...i love it! = ) and guess you should have love it too!get yourself one ba if you go Starbucks ;p

Besides, i get myself a mini book at Borders...
It brings lights to my dull hectic day!

The formula of happinessS

Before that,i had an early lunch with Jiayi at Zenmai...
It's our favourite sushi restaurant to visit!
Ordered lots of food...
Jiayi still feel like demanding for a dessert although she already full... lol ;p

The sushi freak

and before going for the discussion,we went to FOS...
i got a half price shorts...spot it last time dy..luckily didn't buy,or else i gonna 'gek sei'! ahha =p


My group member is kind of rajin type people...compare with him,i am nothing lor...he seems super duper stress and worried for the coming finals...So,after the discussion, he went back already... Since i'm in the mall,i decided to shop around..i timed myself 1 hour to shop...


Saw some glamorous accessories at Vincci accesorries shop...So,i bought this... long time never add any new accessories for myself dy...finally can stock some for the coming CNY~

my earrings and anklet!look galmour not?? ^.=

My next pit alone is Zara...
feel like getting myself another tight jeans of Zara ler...
But just get myself a Forever 21 black fit pants on my birthday...
well....considering...

Compare my current pic and my previous pic...that time i am still having long curly hair...i want to get that length back!!

camwhore-ing for the-day...

I stopped by at Jaya One for dinner before i go back to MC..
while waiting jiayi to finish work,i plan to have a short revision at Oldtown...
But,i saw some crowds at the centre court of Jaya One-Palm Square...
There's a performance from the former Malaysian Idol finalist- Saiful... ( don't even know this name before that...paiseh )
anyway,instead of go to Oldtown,i sat there and watched the performance...
well,there' still lots of space for improvement for the english song that he presents - No Promises...but for malay songs...it's quite nice...most of the malay songs' melody are taken from the chinese songs...

Songs that he performs are- Rindu,Ku masih cintaimu,Aku ada disini....

and there goes my day...

time to fight for exam,again! ^^

misery

[tears from the wounded heart]

Misery...
my heart is bleeding blood...

it's shaking from the pain that is in my head...

i lose myself in all these fights...

Tears

been crying in extreme for more than 2 hours...

make up that i wear blurred my vision...
i just can't help dropping tears again and again...

eyes flooded with tears...

but i left it dried by fans on the ceiling...

Stress...
sleepless nights i had these days...

caffeine can't help but worsen the nights with fears and trembles...
not really cope well with studies...
not really having a good life as what it seens by others...

Sorrow...
i'm in the middle of nowhere...
understanding and care is needed...

but who's care?
no one...

unfold the reality...
and this is where i am standing...

* my eyes is super puffy now